Free Bird Part Two

After eons and millenia of waiting, we loaded our gear up once again. Let me tell ya, we are so fucking sick of packing and repacking and moving and hauling duffel bags and rucksacks, that at this point, I'm almost ready to just cut them adrift and show up with a carry-on bag.

We were stuffed into a tent, all on cots, cots against both sides of the walls, crammed together, cots wedged up next to each other all down the center, gear in the aisles for everyone to trip over, power that goes out at the hottest time of the day, killing the AC. And wiley MPs and Oakley thieves.

That is, until the Hurry Up And Wait game brought us to the airfield and we loaded up on C-130s.

"They have to leave the engines on," some dude instructed, "so make sure you have hearing protection."

I thought to myself, Dude, at this point, you can't do shit for our hearing. Explosions, gunfire, loud machinery, and iPods? Pretty sure if we're fucked, we're fucked, and our aging asses will watch The Price Is Right with subtitles on. Now move.

Rather than panick about the noise coming from the bird, they should warn you about the wind and heat that shoots out of the engines. It's like a giant blow dryer trying to knock you down and scald you.

I put on my headphones and jammed Skynyrd and fantasized about Irish Carbombs and attractive women when the plane took off, and it was just another military flight to me. Didn't really feel like we were leaving, just moving to another shithole, which technically is true. Some dude threw up during the landing procedure, inspiring passionate, "Aww, what the FUCK, man?!" cries from a couple of people. When The Vomitor got on the bus later, we all clapped and cheered for him.

They herded us all across white sand type places to new temporary living places.

Welcome back to Kuwait.


  1. Anonymous said...
    It's funny how I hated those damn planes when they took him away, but loved them when they brought him home. I used to call them "C-5 Tears", the biggest tears I ever cried- and I cried deployment and re-deployment. Hurry home.

    Aunt Sandy
    BigD said...
    Hi Suspect,
    Wow... you have been busy posting haven't you? Hey, I think it is good for you. Words to the page, much more therapeutic than stomach contents to the floor of a C-130. Isn't it all part of the experience? So put it out there bud, let 'er rip! Don't try to keep that stuff bottled up...it's good practice for later. Who knew it would take this long to get you guys home...I think the Army has taken this HUAW policy way too far.

    Also, I get your point about the hearing damage, but, still do your your best to take care of your hearing. Just another example of the collateral damage that no one tells you about when you join up!
    You can come keep me company in the old age home and we can read the TV together. :)
    God(s) bless you Suspect.
    P.S. - The offer to help with the bag drag still stands...I will check out flights to Kuwait today.
    themorethingschange said...
    One step closer....

    It occurs to me C-130's shouldn't qualify as "freedom birds" ....

    they're just big fat old floozies teasing the Joes one last time ....

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